Once in a while we are asked if it is OK to put up Christmas decorations during Advent. Most of the time, people just do it, because everyone else does too. Some folks find it embarressing to be the last family on their block, so they go to it. And, of course, the answer depends on whom you ask because it is largely a matter of custom or tradition.

The Catholic Church generally does not put up Christmas decorations until Advent is over, but when Christmas falls right after the 4th Sunday of Advent, it is likely that some but not all the decorations are visible sooner rather than later. Some parishes that are lightly staffed will need to get started earlier because the priest cannot be expected to put up the decorations (especially if he has no help) on Christmas Eve. Christmas Eve is a family night, we all try to be together with Mom and Pop, brother or sisters, and if that isn't possible, we try to invite or be invited to be with friends.

There have been times that I've spent Christmas Eve alone. I have no more family left, and unmarried people very often do not get invited into a family circle unless they are very good friends. My very good friends moved out of town a few years ago... but that doesn't mean I'm alone. Jesus is with me in prayer, thought, and I have a rich past (as far as family experience goes) so I have lots to be thankful for. As a choir member in my parish, I am usually assigned to sing at either a vigil Mass or at the Midnight Mass, and so I am in the Christmas spirit all the way.

Many people love to celebrate Advent with an Advent Wreath. You know, the four candles, one for each of the four Advent Sundays. In families, especially with children and/or young adults, gathering together each Sunday around the wreath, singing some appropriate Advent hymns, praying together, that's what keeps families together! And, family unity is so important these days. When the family has no togetherness anymore, and hardly ever seek to meet as a group, that's when so many problems begin to arise in the lives of children and teenagers.

In my participation with our Parish's Jail Ministry, I see the results of dysfunctional families, where kids and teens were left to their own devices without parental supervision, with a bad feeling between family members all around, and at times I could cry at the outcome. I meet with them when they are adults. Last year, I met with a young man, in his mid-twenties, a habitual criminal, who was bitter, angry, disgusted with his life on drugs (before he was convicted), and when we talked a little, it became clear that all this began when he was just 12. What did he have to look forward to ... a wasted life. A life that could have had so much potential, notwithstanding unemployment these days.

During Advent, I think of those in jails and prisons, I pray for them, whether I know them or not. I am sensitive to the fact that they aren't home with their families, and that many of them have no more family who care about them. I have an inkling what society in general thinks of them, but to me, especially in this ministry, they are folks who haven't heard too many kind words lately, and whose lives are boring and dull.

I hope there are people who still pray for the less fortunate. That includes imprisoned people. One might reason it was their own fault where they are now, but they are still human beings, and in many cases they are intensely alone but they'll never admit it. Then there are legions of people who have nobody, all over the world. They might be older adults, widowers, or people who never chose to marry. There is, incidentally, nothing wrong with that. Some people believe that there is something wrong with people who stay single, it is simply a chosen lifestyle for most.

Advent is most of all a time for introspection. Time to center on the upcoming Miracle of Christmas, particularly if we are well prepared to celebrate with Jesus. I don't mean Christmas as celebrated commercially, but Christmas in one's heart and soul. Advent, very much as Lent, is a time to square things away. Go to celebrate the Sacrament of Reconciliation... yes celebrate - because when you go and tell your shortcomings and sins to the priest, who sits there "in persona Christi," you will find forgiveness and healing. Let's also pray for all our priests, those in our parish, town, city, nation, and priests around the world!

No matter how alone you feel, you are loved by God! Even if you are a habitual sinner, God loves you, but He does not agree with your sinful life. He suffered and died on the Cross for all our sins, so that we may have redemption. So that we may be with Him for all Eternity in Heaven. Some folks keep living a life of sin, and they think they will get to Heaven if they are baptised. Well, I know some churches proclaim this, but I strongly believe that we have to make an effort to love God... and we cannot and do not love God if we live a sinful life, especially if we do so on purpose.

This is where it gets complicated... we live in a very liberal society, where every night on television it is not difficult to find programming that deals with "the flesh." Sex, rape, criminal activity, murder, etc., and nowadays common subjects of general TV fare. When I grew up, such programming just wasn't the norm, but unfortunately, now it is. Many adults know where and when to turn to another channel because they are mature people, especially people of Faith, who realize how bad a constant flow of this sort of programming is. Those of us who are immature, fickle, easily swayed and especially vulnerable when they are in like-minded peer groups (young or older), often assume that when such things happen on TV, it's perfectly OK. Watch out - because it is not, especially for those who are easily tempted and who have little or no self-control. No, you do not have to live in a convent or monastery, but be mature enough to realise that some of these programs can be dangerous to those who are weak. More examples of "the flesh" we do not need in this world. Jails are filled with them, to capacity.

Use Advent to prepare for the Christmas Miracle, the Birth of Our Lord, and the re-birth of your soul ... prepare, to become a faithful person again, attend church services whatever religion you may be, spend these weeks with good company, and most of all, be at peace!

May God bless you, now and forever!

Fred Schaeffer, SFO
November 11, 2009

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