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God's love for us (Part 2) In this part, of God's love for us, I would like to talk about humility. But before we get there, there are a few steps along the way. Our moral life depends to a large degree on four important virtues, the Cardinal virtues of prudence, justice, temperance and fortitude. Let's examine these virtues one at a time. Temperance: cutting out excesses. People who are at odds with temperance are those who are gluttonous, who live to excess, or who harm themselves in some way, such as excessive dieting when it is not needed. Cowardice is failure in Fortitude. A foolish person does not display fortitude. Prudence is that virtue which sets our course on right judgment and a mature outlook on life. A prudent person acquires this trait as he grows up in his younger years. Persons who are prudent are often those who are honest and truthful. A mature and honest outlook on life is pleasing to Our Lord. Justice. An even-handed approach and view/treatment of others speaks of justice. It is the moderation between selfishness and selflessness. "No one can enjoy real peace of mind unless he has respect for himself; and no one can have respect for himself if he consciously compromises his conscience though fear of consequences. Anyone can be good when it is easy to be good. But God expects more of us than that. God expects us to be good even when it hurts―as so often it does. That is why we need the supernatural virtue of fortitude, one of the four cardinal virtues with which God has endowed all of us who are baptized.¹" These four cardinal virtues are very important in our life as they steer our course in a morally acceptable way. And, when we have fortitude, temperance, prudence and justice, we know ourselves. We will have the means to effect self-control where it is needed and then you will be able "to see yourself as you are, and accept yourself as you are, without resentment or anxiety concerning your shortcomings and without complacency or vanity concerning your gifts: this is an essential ingredient to happiness―this is the virtue of humility.¹" Humility is out of the mainstream, it seems. Many people shun humility, because they have a mistaken idea what it is. They think humility is submissiveness and/or timidity; a weakness. True humility is not like that. One who is humble sees himself in the greater reality, a servant of God, richly endowed with His blessings. He knows he is talented and attributes these talents to a loving God. He is not envious of others because he is aware of his own strengths. He knows that without God's help he can do nothing at all. Don't ever belittle yourself or the talents you have, because they are God's gift to you. Then there is pride that is masked as if it were humility. It's like saying: "My singing is poor (when it is really pretty good), but my friend sings so much better than I." That's pride. Tell it like it is. If you feel your singing is good, don't be afraid to say so, but always be aware that your talents are God given. When we deny that they are God given, we insult God. When we say things that are not charitable, there generally is a lack of humility. People who get annoyed quickly, condemning others for their failures and even stupidity, aren't being honest with themselves. First of all, we have no idea, really, what goes on in the mind of other people. Sometimes nothing is going on, but that's not for us to judge. The humble person never forgets that "there but for the grace of God go I"; as a consequence he is a person of patience and compassion. When you do not have humility, generally you also are not patient with other people, and empathy / compassion is completely out the window. A mature person takes criticism as an opportunity to learn from. We do not like being criticized but at least we could give the other person the benefit of the doubt and examine what is being said to us, rather than throw advice given out the window in scorn. If the criticism does not apply to you, then we mentally file it in the trashcan and carry on. We don't dwell on it and we just forget about it. A humble person is charitable, patient and possesses serenity. One who is proud is weak and thus vulnerable. You want to steer clear of excesses - stick to the middle of the road, treat people maturely, with the dignity they deserve, and keep discord and anxiety out of the picture. Do not inject your own weaknesses into a situation, and make others responsible for your failures. Mature and humble people do not have temper-tantrums. How to become humble―well, know yourselves. Think a little about what you are doing, and most of all discern what you are about to say to the next person. Sometimes it is wiser to shut up and listen than to offer a thoughtless opinion. It is really the responsibility of parents to guide the children they love through their early years and imbue in their kids the sentiments of patience, kindness, maturity, knowing oneself, not necessarily in that order but as situations come along in the rearing of children, and always treat your kids with love and understanding, but not in such a way that they are spoiled. Parents who are over-protective do a child a disservice. And on the other hand, a parent who constantly punishes a child isn't doing the child any favors either. "If parents genuinely love each other and want and love their children, they can make a good many lesser mistakes without doing any real harm to their youngsters. A child can stand a lot of buffeting if he is sure that he is loved.¹" Don't be discouraged. It is natural to be discouraged once in a while. In some months, I cannot quite make it financially - I get discouraged... but we spring back. We have more stamina than we give ourselves credit for. So God smiles, and all is well again. God has given us free will, and He has also given us Grace to use that free will. So a solution to the problem will present itself. We just have to be patient. We should tell our Lord all about it, and then let Him sort it out. And, in the meantime, having placed our troubles at the foot of the Cross - we don't dwell on it. Of course there are exceptions. Who would not be prone to worry, when the rent check is due and there is no money in the account and we know that if we don't pay up there could be dire consequences. But with prayer and mature approach of such a problem, your landlord will probably cut you some slack, particularly if you have lived there for 10 years and never had a problem paying on time. People are more easily discouraged when they are alone, when they have no one to share their burden with. Talk to a family member, or to a friend. Talk to Jesus, he is your best friend. Before long a solution will present itself and then we thank Jesus because we know He made it possible for a solution to be available to us! It takes humility to accept this truth. Also, some people whom I pray for in the course of the year do not think highly of the chances that prayers are heard and answered. These are unfortunately people who will call week after week with the same request and imply that God does not love them. That's just not true. Question is, what have you done to be open to God's healing hand? If you are closed to progress, nothing will happen. But if you realize that Our Lord loves you, and wants what is best for you, then with the expectation and hope that something will change for the better, you are open to His guiding hand and healing or at least relief will come. It takes maturity and humility to formulate prayer requests and then have the expectation that prayers will be answered. Have Faith! Have Faith in God, not in man. Doctors can cure - but only with God's influence and Grace! There will be a Part 3 to this series, but I need to sleep on that and pray about it, to see what virtue or subject will come next. Meanwhile, please stay well, and trust in the Lord always.
Deus Meus et Omnia!
Fred Schaeffer, SFO (1) "More than Many Sparrows". 1958 Leo J. Trese. © Fides Publishers Association, Chicago IL |
