by Fred Schaeffer, SFO (© 2006)

#13

Discernment is a quality found in the monastic environment although it is not limited to monasteries. Discernment is choosing between one or more alternatives. When you "listen to your conscience" you're discerning. Discernment is also important when trying to figure out how to respond to an action proposed by someone else. For example, you're on the way to the office or the store, traffic is at a standstill. The service lane (e.g. breakdown lane) on your highway is open and you figure if you were to use that lane you'd get to your destination faster. You know, however, that using this lane (unless posted to the contrary) is illegal. You could get a ticket. So now you need to discern what to do. Regardless what choice you make, the act of choosing, of practicing discernment will determine what you'll do.

A smart dresser, you know, those legal Wall Street types or lawyers in their pin-striped suits, and often referred to as having "discerning taste in suits." You might see that on the marquee of a clothing store.

Discernment is also a spiritual characteristic. When we prepare to do anything which takes thought, we would be discerning what to do. For example, getting back to our consciences, we often think of a solution. What we have to ask ourselves is if the solution we're thinking about is from God, or if it is from us (our 'self') or if it is from satan. If it is the latter, we better not use that solution.

Mature persons do not cultivate the habit of judging others except for friends perhaps. Fraternal correction is okay unless it becomes a daily habit. I knew a man some years ago who was an avowed perfectionist. He had something negative to say about everything. I liked him because he knew his problem and tried had to come to terms with it. People who criticize often come from an environment, perhaps as a child, where they were constantly and severely criticized by one or both parents. Every time my friend told me "Let me show you how to do this" (in even the simplest things) it caused conflict between us. As time wore on I discerned that I could have been kinder and that he could have been less critical. He should have given me the benefit of the doubt that it wasn't necessary to explain simple procedures. I realized that if I had a problem with his behavior, I should have avoided such conflicts.

Wars are created by people who cannot see eye-to-eye. Wars are also created between governments and countries who are unable to compromise. Great discernment is needed to keep the peace. Charity begins at home and the correct discernment is fueled by charity and a certain degree of common sense. In your daily interaction with other people, please do not take it for granted that you are right. You might both be right. Perhaps only the other guy is but give it some thought! Discern right from wrong!